Cassie DeNisco

Back to School Wardrobe Staples

August 21, 2020

I love making fashion content for you so I thought it would be so fun to put together this back to school outfits video! Whether you’re headed back to school or work, these outfits are perfect for you. Even if you aren’t going back to school as you always have, it’s nice to have these pieces in your closet.

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Boy, Bye

August 25, 2019

I’ve definitely had my fair share of relationships in my lifetime and I’ve seen enough to know that a huge problem in relationships is not knowing when to call it quits. For a lot of people, they realize that the relationship isn’t doing what it is supposed to anymore but continue to hold on to it. Other people let relationships run their lives and stop them from pursuing the things important to them.

Whether it’s the fear of being alone or fear of not having that person in your life anymore, you need to realize that relationships should be happy and then need to contribute positively to your life. My post Babe, Stop Apologizing, touched on the idea that you shouldn’t leave toxic people in your life just because you love them and that absolutely can be applied here. When the relationship isn’t what it used to be and you’ve tried everything in your power to make it work, you need to just walk away. You might be thinking, well that’s easier said then done but believe me there is so much more to this world then your crumby relationship.

I watched a lot of my in both high school and college just long for a boyfriend. They seriously would do anything to just have someone to call their own. I mean if you’re starting out a relationship with your history of being desperate for a boyfriend, it can’t end well and yet my friends somehow made it last. Basing your relationship off the idea that you don’t want to be lonely isn’t the healthiest start to one. A huge question that you need to ask yourself before getting a boyfriend or girlfriend is why am I doing this? Is it because I’m lonely or am I secure enough in my own skin that I can add to someone else’s life? You need to have yourself established before you can give anything to anyone else. You need to have your self-love and confidence in your own skin so that you’re the best version of yourself for someone else. You can’t pour into someone else’s cup if your own cup isn’t that full.

In the world we live in today, relationships look so different than they did in the past. If you look at statistics, people are waiting to get into relationships or not getting into them at all. Reasons vary but the general trend is anti relationships, and personally I’m all for it. Girls today have so much more freedom in what they can say and do, and to be honest most relationships hold girls back. In thinking about my own experiences, there were countless times that I didn’t pursue something because of the relationship I was in at the time. I look back now and ask myself “Was it worth it?” and considering I don’t even talk to that person anymore, it wasn’t.

Why do girls have to lose their identities when they’re in relationships. I wonder that a lot and think that the answer lies in the insecurities of the person they’re with. Most guys can’t handle girls that know what they want and where they’re going in life, especially if they have no clue where they’re going themselves. Girls shouldn’t worry about what their significant other is going to think. Relationships definitely should not run your life to the point that you lose all ambition for the dreams you had. This ties into my earlier point that you can’t get into a relationship that’s going to be happy and healthy until you are secure with who you are.

Now, I’m totally not advocating going out and breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend if you’re the slightest bit unhappy but if any of these scenarios I’ve mentioned fit you, then maybe it’s time to reevaluate somethings. You need to consider why you got into the relationship and how the relationship makes you continue to feel. Relationships are there to make you happy and to add to your life, they aren’t there to stop you from doing what you want to do in life or make you miserable.

Something else I want to touch on is that it is totally okay for you to communicate how you feel to your partner. I feel like a lot of people are afraid to make the first move in conversations because they’re worried it might come off the wrong way. You have to get comfortable enough with the person you’re with so that these types of conversations are easy and painless. It’s good to step back and reevaluate where you are in relationships from time to time so that you make sure you’re on the same page.

It took me a long time to get as comfortable and confident as I am now to even be talking about knowing when to leave a relationship or what not to do to get into one. I for so long hated being alone but now realize I’m better off alone then miserable with someone else. In my life right now I am so content with where I am in my relationship and I know that we both work to better each other and our relationship. If you’re not in a partnership with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re not in a good relationship and that when it’s time to say Boy, Bye.

Body Positivity + Self Love is Different for Everyone

August 17, 2019

Before I had even started my blog, I already had a million and one topics together that I wanted to write about. I wanted a place to share my experiences and hopefully inspire others to start living a life that they absolutely love. My blog has turned into an amazing platform for me to do that but I still haven’t even begun to discuss the topics I am most passionate about. One of those topics is body positivity and self-love.

I never want people to think of self-love and body positivity as an end goal that once you reach it, you don’t have to keep working for it. It’s not like that at all and if you neglect it, it’s only going to turn into a cycle of self-love and self-hate and that’s not something you need to be in the center of. I also want to stress that body positivity means that you love yourself the exact way that you are but that you also love everyone else for who they are regardless of their size, gender, sexual orientation or race. It’s 2019 and we all need to be inclusive and start acting with kindness towards one another and also remember that Instagram isn’t always the full story.

From the outside looking in, a simple scroll through my Instagram feed could tell you that I love the way I look. I’m constantly posting bikini pictures or revealing pictures that put my body on full display. I’ve always been told by boys, and even girls, that I have a great body and I have no reason to ever feel bad about myself. While this could be true, I had been constantly battling with my image for awhile until I just decided, it’s not worth it to constantly put yourself down.

For a little backstory, I went to a private Catholic School for most of my life. I transitioned to public school my freshman year of high school and that’s really where my perception of confidence and image got distorted. High school is already difficult enough but starting a new school with no friends was challenging. I had to navigate through high school with people that were really new to me as opposed to having the people that I had spent my entire life with. Not to mention, I went from wearing a bulky sweater, long plaid skirt, and knee high schools to whatever I wanted to wear everyday. I can remember thinking “Wow I look awful in this pair of jeans” or “I wish my stomach was just a little flatter to wear this crop top” but the people around me were always saying the opposite. It turned into this mess in my mind of what the heck do other people see that I’m just clearly not getting.

I worked out quite regularly from cheerleading and dancing, I ate super healthy and plant based-ish (I didn’t really eat meat but I don’t like to label myself), and I really did not drink or do anything too wild that would make me unhealthy but I constantly could just find something wrong with me. I always felt like no matter what I did I didn’t see results and just didn’t feel great about myself. It wasn’t until post high school when I wasn’t with the same people people everyday that I could finally start to see my worth and realize that image isn’t everything, regardless if being hot and skinny makes you feel more confident.

And while we’re on the topic of body confidence, let’s talk for a second. I have a love hate relationship with the concept of being confident. I think being confident is absolutely important and really can set the tone for how a person can act and interact with people. The problem that I have with confidence is where you get it. I could post a picture on Instagram, get 700 likes, and instantly feel great that people like me and that whatever picture I took looks great. Now, if that’s what you need to do to validate yourself then by all means do it but what happens when the numbers fall the next week and you get less likes or that Instagram shuts down and people don’t use it anymore? I also think confidence from other people is a tricky line because boys could tell you you’re hot one day and super ugly the next. You can’t rely on other people to feel good about yourself. You have to find a way to love yourself exactly how you are from within, not from anyone or anywhere else.

Once I started taking my own advice, I could feel a world of difference. I stopped placing my worth and value in other people and really focused on building myself up from the inside. As I write this now, I’ve never been happier with myself. It’s such a hard journey to take but it’s worth it knowing that you are content with who you are and how you look. For so long I listened to my friends say to me “You have no need to feel bad about yourself, so just stop”. Regardless of how everyone else thinks you look, the only person that matters is you.

And I think that’s really the message that I want to get across to you reading this. Body positivity and self love is so different for everyone and the journeys to get there could not be more different but that’s okay. This whole topics means something different for everyone. There’s no one size fits all in anything in life so you can’t think that you will be able to love yourself for the same reason that another person loves themself. You also can’t try to force someone to love themselves or else it will only be a quick fix. Stop comparing yourself to others because you need to live life on your own terms. The key in all of this is kindness. Remember to not only be kind to other people but also take the time to be kind to yourself.