Cassie DeNisco

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How I Let Self-Doubt Hold Me Back

I think for most of us, we’re our own worst enemies when it comes to self-doubt not feeling good enough for the things in our life. For myself, I know that I easily could let my stress and anxiety about change and new experiences control my life but I try my hardest to not let it. Letting things that scare you control your life isn’t a healthy way to live but a lot of us decide to not overcome the things that stress us out.

Self- doubt has been a huge factor in my life and honestly has controlled some of the decisions I have made. I often feel either not worthy enough for the things in my life or I let the fear of the unknown consume me. It often consumes me so much that I sometimes won’t do certain things or will not go all out in situations that I really would have liked to. I know for a fact if I started truly believing in myself whole-heartedly, I wouldn’t be as anxious of a person as I am.

For a little context, I used to think I was just an extremely indecisive person. Once I dove deeper and tried to get to the root of my problems, I realized that I just wait for “signs” on how to handle situations and and make decisions that may or may not come. And if they don’t come, I let fear take over and not do whatever it is I really want to do. It literally took me almost 22 years of my life to realize this but once I got to the root of my indecisiveness, I realized it was my own self-doubt that was holding me back.

This week alone I have had to make some major “big girl” decisions for myself and I almost talked myself out of them, even though they were things that I really wanted. Just take a moment to think about that, I almost let two amazing opportunities pass me by because I was scared. It was comforting to know that I had other people’s support no matter what I did but ultimately it had to be me making the decision as to whether or not I would pursue these things. Although I’m super nervous, I know that I just need to in a sense rip the bandaid off and get to it.

Having the courage to fight yourself in situations is definitely not easy but is so necessary if you’re like me and are constantly in your head. You can let your internal fears and doubts run your life. Just because something scares you and you’re nervous about it, doesn’t mean you can’t do it and succeed at it. Once you’re in a mindset where you are confident with yourself about your decisions and situations, you’ll realize the life filled with self-doubt that you lived before wasn’t healthy. Whether it has to do with body positivity or fear about how you life is going to turn out, you just have to let it go and start living your life for yourself.

I wish I could tell you an easy way to overcome whatever mental struggles and self-doubt you’re going through, but like I said, it truly took a long time to become at peace with myself. I realized that I can handle situations and I shouldn’t allow the things that make me anxious to live my life. It is truly so liberating when you are able to take your life back and start doing things that make you happy. The light at the end of your tunnel will come and you will make it through whatever scares you. I mean, at the end of the day, if it doesn’t scare you at least a little, is it even worth doing?

Don’t for get to listen to me new podcast Chit Chats with Cass on Apple and SoundCloud.. new episodes every Monday!

Babe, Stop Apologizing

Here’s a little PSA: it’s 2019 and if you’re still apologizing to other people for their bullsh*t, then you need to cut it out.

From dealing with immature people to fake friends, I’ve seen and lived through it all. I’ve had my fair share of drama and fake apologies and I’ll gladly be the first person to tell you that apologizing to appease someone is a huge mistake. My biggest take away is that everyone just automatically expects an apology, regardless of the situation. Band-Aids just don’t fix bullet holes.

 Now, if you’re definitely in the wrong, just apologize and own up to your mistakes but don’t EVER feel like you’re backed into a corner to do it. What the heck is the point of apologizing if someone forced you to do it? And if you’re forcing people to apologize in the form of an ultimatum, reevaluate yourself. People who expect you to right their wrongs generally feel insecure, inferior, intimidated and threatened by you. I mean at the end of the day, that’s all that basically what bullies are. They feed off your poor self-image to fill up their own.

And you know what, while we’re on this topic of that let’s be real with each other. In the world we live in today, apologizes from women are handed out like candy on Halloween. We apologize for everything from girl drama to what we wear to how we act. Let’s stop saying “I’m Sorry” and let’s start cutting to the chase of what’s actually going on. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinion but they don’t have the right to act on it if it’s negative or toxic. It’s seriously time that you stop apologizing for every little thing and start handling situations head on.

This to me really is the key to growing up and starting to live your life unapologetically. Being unapologetic means that you’re making the best decisions for yourself that will positively impact your life both now and in the future. I am in no way advocating for making crazy life changes but I am saying you NEED to start standing up for yourself if you ever want people to stop taking advantage of your kindness and your complacency.

I guess all I’m really trying to say here is just be unapologetic about who you are and own the decisions you make. Not everyone in this world is going to love you, you only need to love yourself.

Why You Aren’t Getting What You Want

My self-help post from last Friday did so well that I thought I would bring to you another post all about getting it together. For many of you, you’re in college and you’re just going with the flow but that needs to change. The only way to start making your dreams become reality is to stop just letting things happen and start paving your own path.

For me, I do that by manifesting. Manifesting to me is focusing on a goal that I want to achieve and basically willing it into existence. Manifesting seems like this complicated concept but in reality it’s just making yourself and your goals a priority. Once I stopped focusing so heavily on school and work, I realized how happy so many other things can make me. Its important to prioritize work and education but those things can be placed above your happiness and mental health.

We all live in a world today that is all about making money and getting to that next step in life. While making money is essential for survival, it’s time that we start doing things for ourselves. Life is not fun if all you’re doing is working, regardless if you love your job or not. As humans, were designed to love things and to become passionate about things so why are we all so over hobbies and passion projects and side hustles as we grow up? Think about it, as kids all we do is dream about our life, all the careers we want to have, and all the things we love. As we age, people just get to comfortable with where they’re at in life and lose that childhood ambition that drives you.

That’s why you aren’t getting what you want and why you’re not living your life for you. I challenge you this summer to take up a hobby or just start doing something that you love. Don’t let your mind tell you that you need to focus too much on money or that you don’t have enough time for something. There are 24 hours in the day and most people only work for 8 of them. If you need to sleep for the other 8 then theres still 8 hours for you to do something for yourself. Take my advice, or don’t, but the happiest people in the world are the people who pave their own paths and live their lives on their own terms.

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